what's in my closet?ssshhhh...

my hinanakit bukid overseas

2009-08-25T09:49:00.000-07:00

1. There were so many questions that are still left unanswered… messages that are left unreplied… feelings that are left unrealized…
2. What I am really afraid of is that I would wake up one morning and find out that I don't really know you at all.
3. The exciting part of being in love is when he catches you when you fall but the painful part of it is when he watches you while you fall.
4. We have lots of differences … I drink hard liquor and you don't. I love fashion clothes, bags and shoes and you like simple shirts and jeans from ukay-ukay. I like adong and chok nut and yet you don't even know that kind of food. I like to spend my free time watching dvd's and browsing the internet while you love talking with people. My circle of friends is different with yours. I like love songs while you like to listen to loud music. You have no time for love while I am giving my time to you. We have different freq. I went to different places just for fun and pleasure; you went to all different places with reasons. You help and serve the people a lot and I ignore them. I always find free time to send you messages and you sometimes forgot to reply. I always say what I want to say; I don't know what's on your mind. I don't know if I'm just being paranoid but do you care?
5. Just a brief question, did you ever know that I was hurting when you intentionally or unintentionally ignored my messages?
6. Well, to tell you honestly, I don't like this feeling anymore. I hate this feeling and I hate to love you. This is some kinda OA feeling. Maybe I'll start learning to let you go. I just hope there is a school for letting go of this hateful feeling.
7. I have this crazy idea, maybe I could call Clark Kent to activate his x-ray vision to this emotionally unavailable guy and check out what's inside his heart and mind. Oh, I don't think so; maybe they could compare notes for being emotionally unavailable.

That's Him

2009-07-15T10:05:00.000-07:00

I am thinking about the guy whom I dated last june 12. He may not be the most attractive, the most handsome or the right guy for me. He may be deadmatic at all times (yah, everytime I sent messages, all his reply was just a simple "ok lang", I'm too busy that please bear with me if I couldn't reply to your messages [which I understand naman]. He may not be the person that whenever you need him, his presence is always there. He may not be the perfect guy that a girl could dream of. But when you see him, when you talk to him, you know he's the one that can make you smile, laugh, and cry all at the same time." He may not be Clark Kent but he is the type of guy who always his risk his life for the goods of others. That's HIM!

If anyone accepts my proposal, you can post your comment/message.

2009-01-23T09:46:00.000-08:00

My mind is busy right now, thinking of what is life ahead of me. I don't know if I was getting pressured again of being a single or was it the weather today (well, it freakin' cold here).

Frankly to say, I'm thinking of this idea almost everyday. I'm thinking of getting married? But girl, the question is who, where and how? In the true sense of the word, I'm really, definitely, accurately, physically, mentally, heartily SINGLE.

How frustrating, right?

But based on my sisters, sis-in law and friends' experience, I'd rather stay single. On the other hand, I want to get married (at least, by name) so that my family, my friends, my boss and my colleagues won't gonna ask me, when am I going to get married.

Sometimes, I really want to post on my friendster and multiply that I need a husband for the sake of having it not for the sake of love. Know what, I am preparing all my conditions and agreement if ever there is a chance that there is a guy who would accept my proposal to be my husband. Check this out.

1. First of all, no physical contact. Coz I still do believe that only loving couples could only that. And, we are just husband and wife only in front of people not of God.

2. Definitely, we will not share the same bed. Both party can live on different house, if anyone of them wants it, but if there is a need to stay and live in the same house, both party should do the needful.

3. We will not interfere in each other's life. But, if anyone of the party needs a helping hand, the party who is in need should accept it. What are husband and wife's for!

4. If there is a need that both parties needs their presence in a occasions like family gathering, holidays, friends gathering, both party should spend time like this.

5. Romantic relationship with the third party should do discreetly and should not be within the circle of friends.

6. If both party needs to share the same house. Responsibilities in the house should be taken care of by both parties.

a. Both parties should share equal house expenses.
b. Both parties should do equal household chores.
c. Both parties should not interfere each other personal things/life.
d. Opinion/views/ideas of both parties should be respected no matter odd it is.

7. This contract will be valid only on a specific time agreed by both parties.

8. If there is a need to add/revise/amend this contract, the additional provision, revision, amendment should agreed by both parties.

9. This contract will not be revealed/exposed to the third parties/family/friends.

Well, if anyone reads this and agreed to this terms and condition, and/or accepts my proposal, you can leave your comment/message. I'm deadly serious.

Late Bloomers in Love, You're probably better off! (Well, I'd like to defend myself)

2009-01-23T04:46:00.000-08:00

by S.K. Smith

Source: California Psychics

Are you beating yourself up for being the last single hold out among your friends? Afraid you'll never meet the right person, that something is wrong with you or that you're simply destined never to find love? Well, stop. If you're among love's late bloomers - for whatever reason - it's time for a reality check.

There are several explanations for why love has been long coming (hint: not one of them includes you not being worthy). Here are a few explanations (and upsides) for you to consider.

The worker bee

One of the most common realities that the settle down early paradigm fails to recognize is that careers take a lot of time - and effort - to build. So if you're among the work-focused forces of nature who inadvertently neglected to pay enough attention to love, don't kick yourself, be grateful. Odds are, you've achieved at least some of your professional goals and are on your way to achieving the rest of them. There's only so much one person can do at a time and you've done a lot! So much so that love would have likely gotten in your way.

However, now that you're looking for love (and at the very least, getting settled professionally), you may want to shift your focus and add a new dimension to your hard working life. Take that can-do spirit that's helped you to succeed at work, and focus it on finding love! No doubt, with a little work, some patience and the willingness to give something new a go, you'll be on the road to romance in no time. And if ever you doubt it, just look back at all you've achieved for confidence.

Victim of young love

Let's face it. When it comes to love, the first cut is often the deepest. In fact, many of love's late bloomers report having suffered a heartbreak at an early age that they never got over completely. This doesn't make you damaged, it doesn't mean your long ago love was "the one," nor does it indicate that you're destined for continued romantic failure.

Instead of continuing to fixate on the past, it's time to move yourself and your love life into the present. You may have to start by facing your fears (intimacy, opening up again). And, you will definitely need to do an honest assessment of your scars as well as how they affect your behavior with potential partners. In addition, if your relationship was abusive, you'd be wise to seek counsel. However, if you're willing to put your past behind you and create the future that you want to have, success in love is attainable. And the best part is, you'll be seeing what you enter into through clearer, more mature, less vulnerable eyes. Having weathered the first storm, you're better armed for whatever's to come.

The soul searcher

Just as common as workaholics and victims of early heartbreak are those of us whose main mission has been not to find a soulmate, but to focus on ourselves. And this, while it may not feel like it at this particular point, is the absolute healthiest approach to finding love. No other human being can complete you, they can only compliment you. So, why not give them the best you possible to compliment? Had you met someone before you felt solid in yourself, they might have met your energy at that time, but who wants that now… now that you've blossomed into you!

If you're a soul searcher who has focused on getting to know yourself and your place in the world, do not, for one second think you've made a mistake… or that it's too late. Quite the contrary. When you're ready, love will come your way. It may just require a tiny shift of intention. When you're ready, begin to focus on meeting your match… and never settle for less. It may take you longer than the average person (those who take the time to work on themselves require someone who has done the same), but the end result will definitely be worth it!

Reality check

While for some outdated reason, society dictates that we should all want to pair off and settle down as soon as possible, the earlier a relationship is entered into, the less chance it has of succeeding - check out the lower divorce rates for couples who meet in their late 30's and 40's. Successful relationships require two active partners who contribute equally and grow together. That's not to say it's impossible for people who marry in their early 20's to be happy - very often, they can be. But mature adults who have lived life a little and seen it past their 30th, 35th or even 40th birthdays, have a lot more experience and wherewithal to bring to their relationships. They know what they want and why… and more often than not, if they're open to it, they get it.

WELCOME 2009!!!

2009-01-01T06:57:00.000-08:00

Moments from my last day of 2008 and First day of 2009.

1. I really had a nice chat with my boss. He asked me if I've found a boyfriend this year, when I said that I still haven't. He was surprised coz he finds me a nice person. Based on what he sees in me, I would take the relationship seriously. That is why, he was surprised that I couldn't find one. Perhaps, that is the reason why I couldn't find one. Men don't want a serious relationship and getting involved in a serious relationship w/ me is a pathetic thing. (too bad!)

By the way, I asked my boss if we have a salary increase this year. The best ever response that he gave is…. IT WILL COME!

2. before the day is through, there is a strange thing happened. My so-called crush asked me if I'm married. Gosh, so he believed with what my colleague's told him that I have 3 kids! Well, of course, I laughed and answered him, "Do I look like I'm married?" And there's one more thing, reading between the lines, he wanted me to invite him for dinner. He can eat Filipino food coz' he used to live in Thailand and he loves Thai food. But me and my clumsy mouth, I told him that I don't know how to cook and the scar on my left wrist is the proof. How's that? I'm really honest, don't ya think? I should have been impressed him and told him that I'm expert in doing that kind of stuff!

Another thing that really surprised me was that before I went to church, he approached me again and make a short chat with me. Whatta, a nice last day of 2008! Not a bad thing, before the day is through, a nice (?) and cute (no doubt) guy approached me! San ka pa?

3. We had a nice and wonderful dinner at our compound with my housemates. I prepared macaroni soup and they really appreciated it, huh! We ate a lot of Filipino foods, drank red wine and beer (hik!) till morning. And I really like the couple living next to my room. They're amazing couple; they really make me laugh by their moves and sweet but weird acts.

4. I had a beautiful dream. Know what? I dreamt of my cutest Atom. In my dreams…. He held my hand so tight and kissed me, in front of Patty. Oh that hurts. I really don't want to be maldita but that's how it goes. But Patty really didn't mind, that that gave me a question mark. Atom told me before he left that he would call me about this thing. Nevertheless, it is still a beautiful dream this new year. Even in my dreams, I've experienced how it was to be with Atom, how held my hand and kissed me. That's a WONDERFUL FEELING!!!

Now, I will be able to start this year with colorful feelings. I can face this year with full of HOPES, COURAGE and LOVE . You can do it, too.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
WELCOME 2009!!!

being single

2008-12-20T23:48:00.000-08:00

Do I have to announce this to the world? Well, the reality slaps on my face that I'm still single. Though all my friends know that I'm not looking for someone but the truth is I do. It's just that it isn't obvious and I don't want them to know that every single minute of the day I'm looking for someone to love and to share my life with (only in my mind). Thank God, at least nobody reads what am I thinking or else she/he might think that I'm truly desperate. (waahhh!)

Peers and friends think that I'm tough coz I can go out alone, no dating, no flirts and always stay at home watching movies and Korean/Taiwan drama. Hey, I always brag about my interests are not boring, enjoyable and thrifty. I don't think they knew me at all coz I'm super great pretentious. Yeah, pretending that I don't need a guy who will stand by me and spend my whole life with him. Dear, if they only knew that every single cold night I'm dreaming that this unknown guy would come and rescue me from my misery. If they only knew that I wish I can share all my fears, my sadness, my happy moments, my funny times, my sweet thoughts, my weird ideas, senseless words, silly opinion to this unknown guy of mine. Does it sound really hopeless?

Did you know that? (This is trivia). Did you know that I always think that I always dream of all the Korean/Taiwan drama would be somewhat the same with my love story? Geeezzz, I know it is not that simple as living my life is very complicated. Things always come the way I don't want it but still I have to cope up with it no matter how painful or hard it is. Come to think of it, living a life the way we want is enjoyable and makes us treasure our fulfilled dreams.

Did you know that… being single in my thirty years, I learned many things.

One, betrayal from your loved ones is the most painful wound you've ever experienced in your life. It feels like you can't bear it nevertheless you have to endure it. Two, forgiving is love's toughest work, and love's biggest risk. To forgive is to dance to the beat of God's forgiving heart. To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. (That's what I learned from God's Daily Bread and from my everyday struggling for life). Three, no matter how many times you fall, be brave enough to rise even if it is you alone. Don't think false hopes that there is someone who will save you from it wishing he is your shining armor. Four, don't be sad, don't get mad, just enjoy every moment of being single, who knows, you may not experience the things you are doing now if you have significant others. Five, trust and respect can be earned. It isn't easy to give to one another. It is a process that everyone has to go through before you learn to trust and respect yourself and others. Six, it's okay if you always do mistakes in your life but remember not to do the same mistake. Because that only means, you never grow and never learn from it. Seven, don't lose faith and hope in finding your true love even if it takes forever, it's worth waiting because that is your true and lasting love that will make you happy the most. Eight, cherish every moment you have with your family, friends and colleagues. Don’t wait for another day to come, or a week, or a month, or a year. Just enjoy every single moment with them. . You might regret it in the future if you didn't make your most effort.

Cut and Paste

2008-12-08T13:40:00.000-08:00

THE ORIGINAL QUOTE

If you love someone,Set her free...

If she comes back, she's yours,I

f she doesn't, she never was.....

THE NEW VERSIONS R.....

Pessimist: